omsk

Oh pointed intently at smile blinding sunshine
thinning air is shortened breath and droned broken speech lines
 

corporeal

i spent a lot of time by myself at the river today. i saw a bird, a seagull, and it took to the skies. i almost cried to myself, because i couldn't follow it. the other bank stared at me across the depths and i wanted nothing more than to be in the shelter of the trees.

i don't need love

i cant calm down at all
panic is what panic feels like

why can't we just stay silent?
speaking now seems far to violent

speaking now seems far too violent

if my brain is melting in my head,
at least my body is still walking

im waiting for a moment that i cannot describe
a thing as untangible as a wisp of smoke
and yet it is the only piece of reality i still grasp




i feel the soul in my body slip out from the holes in my shoes
i've crawled too far and ive been searching for too long
i haven't cut my hair in years

second hand goods

im not sure why i feel so disappointed. i knew it would happen, i'm not any different than the people that came before me. from the stories and the gloomy stares, i know there were a lot. despite my expectations, being so blatantly replaced is hard to deal with. i am extreme, i go from a state of happy aloofness to a hardened stare where all i can see is gray. it happens daily, i don't want to feel like this, where things are slipping away, where nothing is in my control and i lose sight of happiness with a fleeting glance. logic tells me that unsteady emotions are part of being young, but young i am not. i have lived for thousands of years in the trees and the grass, in the oceans and in the meadows. i saw the trojans march on rome, i heard the shot at fort sumpter, i felt the berlin wall come crashing down around me. the same blood pulses through all of humanity and yet i couldn't be more different from the people around me.