i heard something sad today

i guess i'll just take this up and store it away with the rest

the more the merrier

real love, i'll give it

i forgot you can't see me now.  

i forgot

i forgot... no one can see me anymore

wait,  no one could ever see me.

i forgot 

i forgot i don't exist.

knocked up.

again, another sleepless night.  i don't understand what it is, i really don't.  why can't i sleep anymore?  i'm exhausted.  it would be so convenient to not have to think, but i always do.  its like as soon as i'm left alone, to my own thoughts, they come at me harder than a brick wall.  my concentration goes out the window, my sense of responsibility right along with it.  in return my mind is flooded with all these pictures, thoughts, writings.  

falling through a field.

i could feel this tightening of my chest, yet at the same moment a loosening in my lungs.
my heart could finally take a beat
and i knew that someday i would be free.

i could feel myself falling backwards into the sky
as if i was in rewind.

it was like my head was never there to begin with,
there was no body to confine me, and no questioning eyes to hold me down.

at that moment i was alone, and yet my soul had merged with everything around me.

purchased popularity.

 

this has nothing to do with you,

stop it. 

everything i once had.

Please understand
This isn't just goodbye
This is I can't stand you
This is where the road crashed into the ocean
It rises all around me
And now we're barely breathing
A thousand faces we'll choose to ignore

Curse my enemies forever
Let's slit our wrists and burn down something beautiful
This desperation leaves me overjoyed
With fading lights that lead us past the lives that we destroy

I listen to you cry
A cry for less attention
But both my hands are tied
And I'm pushed into the deep end
I listen to you talk but talk is cheap
And my mouth is filled with blood
From trying not to speak
So search for an excuse
And someone to believe you
In foreign dressing rooms
I'm empty with the need to

Lay rotting where I fall
I'm dead from bad intentions
Suffocated and embalmed
And now all our dreams are cashed in
You swore you wouldn't lose then lost your brain
You make a sound that feels like pain

So please understand
This isn't just goodbye
This is I can't stand you

cadillac ranch

it was cold as balls!